This Mother's Day we had our usually plans for a family BBQ. Lacy is home with her new son and all were going to be there. The weather was good and all pointed to a great day. Then bam, I was hit with a terrible upper respiratory infection that sent me into a spiral. So Kyle made the decisions to cancel. I was heart broken but grateful. Laying around for 5 days I did a lot of thinking about What is Mothers day all about. Well our Mothers of course but how and where do you draw the line? When do you draw it? When will I be there? When I am old and all gray? What is it actually about? I have always put my Mothers Day aside for my Mother and Mother in laws, That is not a bad thing. I want to honor them and its not about me. I miss my Mother dearly everyday and especially when I am sick. Everyone wants their mommy when you are sick. But life moves on. So we prepared or planned for our BBQ. To celebrate Older Mothers, Middle age Mothers, Young Mothers, New Mothers, Expecting Mothers, Aunts, cousins and so on. But when it didn't happen I felt a huge void. Even though there was no way I could have pulled it off I felt bad. I knew all understood but I felt lost being home alone with my husband doing all the work. Sure the kids stopped by but I didn't want them getting sick so on they went. So I laid around thinking. What do I want for my Mothers day. Well to be together for one. But our family does that quite a bit. So for one thing my Mothers Day blessing is that our children still want to come around us and help us out, two, that they enjoy things we enjoy, three- that they have all grown up into wonderful healthy adults, four - they have all found love, (well like anyways), five - they have good jobs, six - they respect and love one another, seven - they respect and show their love for us, eight - they can and still talk to us, nine - they dream with us, and ten - God gave them to me. God answered my dream to be a mother. I have three wonderful sons and I thank God for them every day. But Mothers Day is about them. Not me. I am here for a job I love. They give me the gifts everyday! I love you Clayton Thomas, Aron Redmond and Wade Lyndon! Thank you for loving me and letting me love you:)
But yes there will be a BBQ next year:)
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